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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

today went to sch as usual and had lunch at pasta mania with guo long,hui fung,jacey,yun ni,lusia,bing. i had agio olio which is just plain paste cooked in olive oil and garlic and chilli. really very nice den i went 2 catch transformers as i really wanted 2 watch it. watch it alone thou cause most of my classmates either watch it or not interested. so yea. than my outside friends either working or not free cause so late minute so i went to watch alone. so i sat at seat K-14. it was the last row from the back and the last seat too. i was like omg this is the second time i watch a movie alone cause usually i would have alot of ppl calling me out or like go out and watch together as a group would be real fun. so yea was watching it. the whole show was like wow. its intense would put u back in ur seats as during the whole show it was all the way fighting and romance all. well i felt the directors also focus on 1 actor and thats the lead female actress. there's one scene which she was on the bike wearing hot pants. i bet all guys must be looking at her butt la. cause the camera was like so ovbious focusing on that part of her and her figure all too. so the whole show was really interesting but one part i couldn't get it was there was this part of the show which they use a small fragment of the cube to revive the megatrons leader and y didnt they use it to revive optimus prime? weird eh? cause if i not wrong the cube gives intenst energy and stuff so y didnt it give optimus prime back life? thats 1 part i didnt understand haas. and also one more thing i hope transformer 3 would have megatron dead. cause if his still alive the show would be meaningless it would just cont and continue all the way and it would be boring so i hope megatron would die and maybe a new leader or something?

7:54 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Monday, June 29, 2009

yawnz.. today i felt sleepy maybe cuz sleep late last night. gonna get used 2 school life back again. so today woke up at 8am and realise late for sch so what 2 do? take cab down of course. haas. so anyway met my new lecturers for new subjects such as MDBP and BSIT which are david and jason. i feel their ok teachers la. so yea went back sch all. and having lessons as usual. than was thinking i have so many things i have not done so many things i want to accomplish so many things i need to do. so yes i must make full time of my life and stop wasting time and just do all the things that i want to do.

i just feel very blessed to have alot of close friends who actually care for me and all and cheer me up when i broke with my ex even thou its quite a while. but yes i still think about her. but now i'm trying to think lesser and less le. cause occupying myself with many many things no time to think. just keep doing things and at the end of the day i will jus go back and have a good rest for the next day it will be a better day! haa so after school met cindy and jenna for dinner as didnt meet them for like super duper long. so we went to eat fish and co and chat alot of funny and lame things that happen during ite. such as like how jenna got chased by kenneth into a relationship really funny nxt time i tell u all what happen. really cute. and roberts how he chase dila for a relationship and stuffs and all. but its really cute la. all the happy memories really make me feel so xing fu to have such close and good friends that support me thru all e way.

7:01 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Sunday, June 28, 2009

hi all below is a story i wanna share with u all!
its called When you divorce me, carry me out in your arms

On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped
in
front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of
the
car in my arms. So I carried her into our home.


She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene of ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid,
I
went into business and tried to make more money.


When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us
seemed
to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and
got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding
school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
more
likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This
was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her
words
suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, Men
like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls. Thinking of
this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I
couldn t help doing so.

I moved Dew s hands aside and said, You go to select some furniture,
O.K.?
I've got something to do in the company.Obviously she was unhappy,
because
I had promised her to go and see with her. At the moment, the idea of
divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something
impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter
how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly,
she
was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was
sitting
in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon.Then we watched TV
together.
Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew s body. This was
the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what
will
you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently
she
believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn t
imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the
staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide
something
while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently
smiled
at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live
together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate anymore.

When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. Ive got something
to tell you, I said.

She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what
I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly.

She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
softly, why? . I m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called
answer
turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you
are
not a man! .

At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly
give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that
she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She
glanced
at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman
who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day.
But
I could not take back what I had said.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected
to
see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release.The idea of divorce
which
had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.

A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her
writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast.


When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was
asleep
again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t want anything from
me,but
I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the
month s time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was
simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she
didn
t want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do
you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This
question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I
nodded
and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I
have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day
when
we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out
from
the bedroom to the door every morning.

I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished
to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
the
result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me
feel
uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when
I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought
me
a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door,
I
walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said
softly, Let us start from today, dont tell our son. I nodded, feeling
somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for
bus,
I drove to office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily.She leaned on my
chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.
I
realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for a
long
time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles
on
her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being
demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were
still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The
visualization of Dew became vaguer.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,
where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking,
etc.I
nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.

I didn t tell Dew about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.

She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried
quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my
dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was
because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because
I
was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart.
Again,
I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her
head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said.
To
him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential
part
of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly.
I
turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last
minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the
sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and
naturally. I held her body tightly,
as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made
me
sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step.
Our
son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope you will hold me in
your
arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn t notice that our life
was
lack of such intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
any
delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened
the
door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I m serious.

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no
fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can
only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring
probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because
we
didn t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried
her
into the home, she gave birth to our
child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry
to
you.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed
the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the
office.

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
wife
which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting
words
on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every morning until
we
are old.

3:09 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Tuesday, June 23, 2009

hihi all first of all sry for such a long break from blogging. been having lots of happening things in my life. haas and decided to take a long break and just enjoy life. well to list things out i went to play mahjong with my buddies well its for fun den all talk about ns life all dam sian i haven ns. i cant wait to go in ns. want to be fit and finish the 2 years quickly and go to uni to pursue my degree and maybe continue on with masters and doctorate. well ambitious right me? well of course aim high and even u fall also wun fall far from that goal. haas well this week alot of events line up. mon-tuesday meeting up with jy and wed gg out with my classmates. thursday meeting my ite friends and either friday or one day for paintball session with friends saturday gg to church and sunday prawn fishing. haas.

3:53 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Monday, June 08, 2009

HOHOHO back again! haas anyway today was a very tiring day for me thou. if you guys dunno. my poly's having term break so every1 is like having holidays.. so well for me i'm having block teaching so yea sch still have not end for us so as usual monday's school as usual just that there's no SWEN haas guess dr foo very happy with his new baby girl called hannah anyway gonna wish him a early father's day too. haas and maybe he forgot about us? haa oops. hmmm today nothing much just keep doing coding all and keep doing till about late den went back and had dinner with bing as she wanted to buy cake for her brother b-dae. oh ya talking about that wish her brother happy birthday too LOl. tis post seems to be so weird, no full stops. no stops and commas just continuous of talking. i'm basically just trying to remmeber whats going through my mind right now so yea. so i went back and on the train there was this very unusual thing. i got up the train at tampiness and while the train was going and i not sure which stop it arrived there was this really slim and sexy young lady in hot shorts and top and she came into the train and of course i notice her cause it was like wow. so the train left and this young lady was sitting opposite me and she suddenly quietly broke down in tears. i didnt saw that cause was listening my music on my ipod nano. and as the train was moving i saw tears slowly falling down her eyes and she tries to cover it by like covering her face and stuff. hmm at that point of time many thoughts came through my mind. could she just lost her job? broke with her bf? got scolded? too many thoughts but i couldnt come to the conclusion but just quietly sit opposite seeing tears fall down her face and she was trying hard to wipe the tears from her eyes and in my heart was like telling me go up to her and give her a tissue. and i was like omg i must be crazy to do that what if later she slap me or wad cause she already moody all? what if i give her tissue den she scold me or wad den i feel embarass in the train? so i waited till like 3 -4 stops i took like my packet of tissue walked infront of her and gave it to her. and surprisingly she didnt scold me or wad. she was like gave me a smile and i felt really glad inside cause at least i see a smile in her face. and i felt good too.so train was going and she got off like at paya lebar i think? and i went back ba. must be thinking why i type so detail right? i duno why maybe want to share with u all that little things we do around us could bring a smile to others even the person maybe feeling low. although she did not say thank you or what i felt happy cause at least it bring about a smile in someone life even when the person is feeling so down. at least me a stranger cares for her? haas. okok i shall end this draggy and long blog post. tomorrow still have lessons. nights!

8:42 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Saturday, June 06, 2009

Strength and preseverence is all i need to finish this last lap of the race to the end of this sememster! 1+ week left ba. aiming to get both subject get B or A? maybe? hope so i really work really hard so that when i grad and go ns after ns i have more opportunities to pursue the courses i want.

7:58 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Friday, June 05, 2009

TIRED!

been feeling really drain out and sleepy this few days. really really tired. datelines and projects submissions very near and ending of sememster soon le. abt 1 half weeks more till end sememster and 2 weeks of break. gonna rush my work all paul u can do it de jiayou!

8:28 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Wednesday, June 03, 2009

been really busy in sch.. will try to update as soon as possible. been studying and doing lots of school work. so any way tomorrow is ewad presentation and swen interview too.. really stress. anyway was listening to a song by hillsongs really make me fill with energy back. the song is HillSongs- Through It All. really nice song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDg2Fnr6KRE here it is. anyway reading on cvs and scm now. shall continue tml.

8:10 AM
My heart skipped a beat;


Monday, June 01, 2009

today was a long day. was in school whole day as usual and had swen lecture too. met jy for a movie at tampiness mall and we watch night at the museum 2. i have to admit its funny but the first movie of night at the museum is more funny. there was this 1 scene where dexter and abel these two monkeys were slapping the guard. very funny haas. so after movie i went back home to finish my RBL learning as we have to compile all by tomorrow. its good to start early so that got more room for improvements. so anyway just finished my RBL part and shall go to sleep its 2 am in the morning now.

8:55 PM
My heart skipped a beat;


Interlude

Hi Welcome to my blog
enjoy your stay here!

Sealed with a Kiss

Paul Liew
22
28th September 1987

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Confess



Track 04.mp3 -